Everyone wants to stick to resolutions…
Resolutions are typically made at the start of a new calendar year, but they are often made throughout the year as well. Whenever you decide to declare a resolution, you encounter that clear solid feeling of embarking on a new journey to: lose weight, begin a budget, get in great shape, never let your closets look like this again, and so on. Nice feeling, and nice goals. So, what’s wrong with this picture? Why does it so often not work? For many of us, after a little while we give up or rationalize our resolution away.
I think it’s the resolutions. They are simply too big. I consider myself to be fairly budget-and waste-conscious, and to be completely honest, even for me, just thinking about creating a budget instantly triggers fear in me. It feels like a test I haven’t studied for. I imagine there are many details I haven’t a clue about. I feel anxious about having to face all those things I should have done, but haven’t. Thinking of the money I won’t have if I don’t create a budget is frightening, too. The whole thing, no matter which direction I approach it from, overwhelms me into immobility. My imagination runs wild with scenarios of never-ending numbers, charts and forms, books to toil through, terms to learn, all of which squashes my will power. As motivational speaker, psycho-therapist, and author of Get Off Your But, Sean Stephenson, succinctly summarizes, “Imagination trumps will power.” Indeed, it does.
Here’s a simple approach you can use to keep your imagination in check, and turn an overwhelming resolution into an attainable one that spells “success.” Basically, it’s breaking down the “Big Goal/Resolution” into more approachable segments:
Recognize the truth of your situation.
Without overanalyzing or judging, just state the situation and the big resolution/goal.
- I’m Bud, I have too much debt, my spending patterns are putting me more in debt and my family’s well-being in jeopardy. I need to get out of debt.
Set an immediately achievable mini-goal.
Select just one small aspect that you can easily attain success with right now (a mini-goal) that’s on the path which ultimately will lead to the big resolution/goal.
- I will start to save money daily by bringing my own lunch from home.
One mini-step at a time.
From that mini-goal, clarify one small specific action-task that you will do do right now, which contributes to making that mini-goal a reality.
- I will start tonight by making a big salad, and use that to bring two lunches to work.
Identify a deep desire, and visualize.
One of the more recent popular buzz-expressions is “vision board”. I know, it may be a tired phrase now, however desire and visualization can be great motivators. They can actually shift your entire focus and outlook.
I will share with you that many years ago I used to be a cigarette smoker. I told myself that if I ever had children, I would stop, and I did, but up to that point I never even attempted to quit. Besides enjoying smoking, I was a self-defined “smoker” and relished the identity of being a smoker. I was afraid that my friend’s perception of me would change if I no longer smoked. Would I still look cool? Would I still seem artsy and edgy? What would I do when I was nervous? What would I do when I wanted to sit back and enjoy a moment? The interesting thing here is that when I did stop smoking, no one noticed! Seriously, after 15 years of chain smoking, no one even noticed that I was not smoking anymore. Many of my fears had been for nothing. A deeper desire, to be a healthy mom for a healthy child, became far and above more powerfully motivational for me than any momentary selfish transient need for self-gratification. My “giving up smoking” was no longer the issue. Whether I thought I could or couldn’t quit smoking was no longer the primary concern, focus, goal, or resolution, because it was not the deeper desire — having a healthy child was. And visualizing a healthy baby made my self-identity shift from that of being a smoker to being a healthy parent, more easily achievable.
So, how can this “shift” in desire help you begin to approach a debt problem? Let’s put in an example relating to personal finances:
Identify a Deeper Desire, also known as: An Alternative Impact:
- I want to set a good example for my children. Notice this desire is not the big resolution/goal, which is to get out of debt, but is something outside of the “self”, yet also has an emotional connection.
Create a Visualization for your deeper desire:
- Every time I prepare my lunch and bring it to work, my savings grows by $10. (that’s $3,650 a year!) And my whole family will join in preparing lunches; we’ll all get healthier; the whole department at work begins to bring their lunches in, and once a month there is giant pot-luck lunch; everyone becomes friendlier and more productive; I get a raise and … now, that’s a nice picture to visualize, right?
Now, no matter what, one thing Bud knows for certain, he CAN bring his lunch and save $10 a day, (and still look cool.) And every time he brings his lunch, his vision of succeeding at his deeper desire, which is to set a good example for his children, grows stronger, while at the same time he’s also getting closer to achieving his ultimate goal, which is to get out of debt.
What happens if you derail? Advice for those on the diet trek is to realize that these little moments are bound to happen, and to just consider that cookie to be a minor speed bump which is now over and done with, and to get right back on the treadmill. Sounds like a good approach to achieving long term success for any goal. So, if there is an occasion where Bud derails by doing something like say, buying lunch out without planning or budgeting ahead for it, he’ll just get right back to the kitchen counter that night, make his salad, and visualize that additional $10 in the bank, and know he’s back on the road.
After a couple of weeks or so, he can add a new mini-goal and visualization; his daily savings will continue to grow and after a short time, Bud will be tackling big ticket items with less anxiety and more mastery. And so on and so on.
Break-down the big goal into smaller more attainable steps, keep your imagination filled with a meaningful vision, because THAT is what drives your will power. Before you know it, you’re in control of your “resolutions”, your spending, and your savings!
On-topic videos with more pointers:
Avoiding Debt, You Can Do It - The inspiring story of Mary Hunt, founder of DebtProofLiving.com.
1 Cent Saved = 1.5 Earned - The true value of saving money explained.
Financial Goals - Easy step-by-step tips to saving money, from global accounting firm, Ernst & Young.
How to Save Money the Right Way - Founder and CEO of mint.com, Aaron Patzer’s tips to manage your income
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